self reflection

11/07/23 - Mia

I used to have a lot of friends. I’ve gone through 16 years surrounded by people who I thought loved me, but later I would stand incorrect. Because now, they are gone. I don’t see them throwing rocks at my window anymore, or biking around at sunset. I don’t call certain friends at random times, because now we rarely talk. This year has been a big change. But maybe, it’s for the better. 

As I grow older, the quieter I am, and sometimes I catch myself wanting to stay inside rather than out. And since I’m a girl with a severe case of FOMO, this is extremely new for me. Instead of feeling lonely when I’m by myself, I feel the quite opposite – I feel surprisingly free. 

It seems that the topic of going from the constant need to surround yourself with people to just wanting to be by yourself is barely talked about. Yes, I am quieter and have fewer friends but it doesn’t reflect on my self-worth. I have grown qualities that I am proud of.  Now, I am observant. I am a thinker. I got to know myself when I used to not know who I was at all. And as I look in my reflection, and see myself change, I don’t worry. Because I know that everything will be okay in the end.