The Art of Doing Things Alone

☮︎⋆˙❀⟡☾☼

☮︎⋆˙❀⟡☾☼

Sep 26, 2023

  One year ago, at 17, I decided to move to a foreign country by myself. Ironically, I wasn’t really prepared for how much time I would spend completely alone. Outside of going to class and occasionally going out with friends, I was literally alone all the time. The solitude itself wasn’t what scared me, the true challenge was having to consistently navigate things that were unfamiliar to me without the support of someone by my side.  

 Although I still have lots to learn about independence, I believe that in the past 12 months, I’ve gained solid insight into the surprisingly taxing art of doing things alone. For instance, I’ve gotten comfortable with constantly trying new things and going to new places on my own. I learned how to advocate for myself, take responsibility, and solve problems without expecting someone else to do it for me. I experienced first-hand how being codependent (especially on one specific person) can eventually backfire and I learned how to recover from it.

  Most importantly, I learned that nobody is ever truly alone. Independence doesn’t mean you can never ask for help, and it definitely doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t rely on your support system when you need it. No matter where you are or how alone you feel, there will always be people in your path who are willing to help you. Personally, I struggled so hard with asking for help because it felt like admitting I couldn’t succeed on my own. Now I understand that knowing when to rely on others is the most important step to living your best, independent girlboss life.

• Julia Deabreu (@oh.juuliadeabreu)